Its 2 am. Insomnia has me up. Why? Change. It's all about change. I have had bad news . I have experienced good news.
I'm worried. I am fretful. I am anticipating a new year. I am over thinking. I am under resting. Holiday seasons see good, pain, and reflection. The words of Scout vespers are running through my head : Have I done my daily task? Have I kept my honor bright? Can I guiltless sleep tonight? Have I done and have I dared In everything to be prepared.?" Powerful and profound words in this song from 30+ years ago ( summer camp 1988) . I have been thinking a lot about the law and oath I swore as a youth. I think about the Vigil obligation I took. I have, since 1987, when I joined cub scouts, repeated weekly these oaths, obligations, and undertaken to uphold them. I have, for all intents and purposes done well on my path: a PhD, awards, recognitions. Two books from EduMatch® and a third on it's way. So why are there echoes of impostor syndrome? Why are there doubts? Why are there feelings of emptiness? Is it my own high standards? An I feeling guilty for a 20 year career which lead me away from my family and the greatest community ever in the #716? Or is it what people feel as they flip from building a career to reflecting and recalibrate? The prayer of penance also runs through my head: I confess to God Almighty, before the whole company of heaven, and to you, my brothers and sisters, that I have sinned in thought, word, and deed; in what I have done and in what I have failed to do, by my fault, by my fault, by my most grievous fault.... I hope this new year to keep doing well by doing right. Its here! Happy birthday to my second book A Cog in the machine!
I cannot believe that I can tell my career story, and how I tried to make a difference in people's lives! |
AuthorOver 20 years experience in consulting for improvement. Lean and Six Sigma Certified. PhD in Leadership Archives
November 2022
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